Tears

I've been doing a lot of crying lately. I don't know if having children has naturally made me a more empathetic person, or if the Holy Spirit is prompting me to pray by having me feel other people's pain, but whatever the cause, I cry on a regular basis these days. It started when my friends the Stavs announced their pregnancy. I burst into tears of joy at the thought of my good friends finally getting pregnant (with twins!) after nearly a decade of trying. I cried harder a few months later when we thought they had miscarried and harder still when we found out that their little boy had severe heart defects along with a cleft palate. I cried every day for the month leading up to their birth, anticipating the death of their little boy and just not knowing how they were going to survive. Little Will didn't die, in fact he's doing quite well after a successful heart surgery, but I still cry for them as they watch him work to breathe and eat, and I cry tears of joy when I see pictures of their healthy little girl and the four of them as a family. I cried when a friend relayed to me some painful childhood memories that she's working through and cry when I think about the damage done to her self-esteem. I cried when another friend told me about some marital difficulties she's going through and again when a different friend relayed some dissapointments she faced and how they made her question her faith. I cried Saturday when my little girl was in pain from the thrush in her mouth. I cry when I'm lonely for my family, when Hubby and I have an argument, when I feel too tired to get through the day. I find it amazing all the different things that will set me off. I never used to be like this. How do tears manage to express so many different emotions so adequately? Pain, frustration, sadness, joy, anger, disappointment. Crying over death and new life, marriage and divorce, in grief and with joy. Thank God for tears, which help me to connect with and care for my friends, to let go of pain I would otherwise hold too close, and to express emotions that I can't convey in any other way.